Duh

Was toking with gab online til 7+ then i had my dinner. Back to room n watch tv, juz before 9pm i fell asleep. Woke up around 1am n saw gab's sms. Asking me to play Dota, but when i log in no even a single soul. LoL! Guess they had already gone to bed, knowing that gab is collecting his car so he need plenty of rest then go roaming around. Was online for the whole night seeking some good wallpapers. Manage to find a chinese website with Transformers data. The artwrk is damn well done n i had download the Stunticons. After reading the pages i decided to make a wallpaper of my own. Theme will be Stunticons!!!! After hours of repainting n editing this is wat i get.

















Guess it still look sux....oh well, im not that experience in doing this kinda stuff. Like i said i spent hours juz editing these 2. 3 more to go and i can put all of them together and make the wallpaper.

Asked mum to buy me nasi lemak cuz im stil very awake. Really hope i can fall asleep before noon. If not i will be spending my night sleeping away again. Time to go Breakfast.. Will update again if i got anymore program coming tonight.

Haizzz

Been more than 2 weeks. Everything around me juz seems not to be going on smoothly. Biggest thing of all is having a quarrel with my buddies. For more than 10 yrs of frienship and i found out that it's how they see me as. Been very bothered about this issue for days. Hopefully it will get better as time goes by. Work is the same for me thou its very far. Everyday travelling to simei is getting on my nerve. Anyway my contract will end next month. Gotta find a new job soon.

Another thing that made me very sad is my job interview. I flunk it and was very disappointed, all blame it on my body. Was born weak and mayb im juz useless for all my life. Had very high hope on this job. Was thinking if i got it i may had a chance to go somewhere else and start my life all over again. Who knows.... mayb im destined to stay in singapore. If n i say IF i really cant get a job soon enough, i will juz go bak to my slacking life for the moment. I dun really care how people see me now. Even they think im a trash or junk, so be it. Im wat i m and i enjoy my life this way. If anyone doesnt like it then too bad.

Been thinking about alot these few days. About me and my life. I think im really a failure when comes to handling frds. So i guess for the moment, i will juz be alone. Some pple might think im sick of them thats y im leaving them. Cant really control wat others think of me. If they really think that way then no way i can change their mind. I need to be alone and think for awhile. If things goes well i will appear again. If not..... i will juz stay alone. Being alone..... i dun have to feel responsible for others and the same others dun have to feel responsible for me. Mayb this the way life is for me.

Wed and sat is becoming very standard for me. Zouk , Double O and so on. Sometimes even friday also will go dbl O. My life juz that boring, and wat else u can do except clubbing? But still was satisfied with my life now. Even thou i go clubbing, i still see my frds and sometimes will talk to them. But when time is up i will juz leave alone and go home by myself. People might think i see them as nothing cuz i dun even bother about saying bye or wat. Well thats life and that wat others think. Let them be...... Even the my best buddy also mistaken me as a guy with ill intentions. Alwiz picking pple around me. Hmmm if im really wat everyone think, then i think the decision i made is suitable for me now.

Today should be ziwei's wedding dinner. But thurs i decided not to attend it. Roger asked me why but i couldnt explain why. I dont want to feel like im not myself at the dinner. Thou i knw there will be mambo regulars there. But the truth is i dun really know them well. We didnt even talk more than 2 sentences when we meet everytime. So....i guess its better for me not to go. I dun wan to feel weird n like a stranger down there. Go there eat n keep quiet, times up then say byebye. Then wats the point of going if im not going to enjoy the dinner. I knw this decision is hard and i knw pple will start saying things about me after that. Like i said earlier....i dun really care now. Juz say wat they wanted, since my reputation is already so bad.

Its sunday night and i guess i need to force myself to sleep. Tmr is a brand new week, juz hope that everything will go smoothly for me.

"Being alone doesnt have to feel responsible for anything."

Lost

Lost?? dun knw why but....theres been alot of clubbing for me last 2 weeks but didnt have the mood to blog. Was watching tv but its was so sad so i decided to blog.....After stoning for awhile i stil dun knw wat to write about. Was tokin to yii on Msn n watching chn8...got koda kumi Mv...Nose bleed sia. LoL!

I think i shall update on my activities... week before andrew n i went to bbbc to support aaron. Andrew wanna go down n check out the place too. Was there around 11 n surprised to see crowd there. Saw pple frm nightlife too. Was a big group n they r damn havok. But too me, too havok is noise for me. So we find some quiet place n chat while we chill the night away. First we were dragged up by someone cuz andrew was a member of nightlife so he knew few of them. Our drink were being taken away by others soon we join them. At that point of time i was abit hungry so i took the food on the table...well they took my drink so its ok for me to eat some. Everyone was havin their fun but both of us still tokin to each other. Like we r cast away like that. As the noise is getting too loud i decided to go somewhere else. We saw two new drinks on the table, grabbed it n run. Not bad la! Some finger food n renew our beer, wu hua leh! Aaron is very high that night....he drank alot n first time i see him doing break dance and fell down! LoL.... Party ended n we went to kopitiam for supper....andrew wanted to catch the last nightrider i manage to make him stay for the first train. We sat outside city hall mrt n chat again. Throughout the night we tok about lotsa things. Anything n everything under the sun. It's been a long time i had a long chat with someone.

After waking up i was abit tired, doesnt wanna go dbl o but already promised andrew. LoL!!!! Bo bian la for a frd i go there. Luckily adrian got go also. But hes abit low on cash so i will be paying the cab fare for him. Had a good night at dbl O cuz of the muzik. Mondae was a holidae so i spent my time shooping at various places alone. Got my pepsi twist optimus prime and a new panasonic hp. Waited so long n its finally sold at $98!!! So blah blah after weekend wrk n wrk then mambo.. Mambo is ok and i m not going to say much. As for Dbl O last night im not going to say anything much also. Last night i really wished someone could kill me. I felt so sian n nothing i could do. But at least i shared cabby with jason. Having a pack of mee once i got home. Watched tv for a while n i slept around 430. Woke up n 10 n could find anythg to do now. So boring......

Thats all i think....finally manage to squeeze out a few words. If not some pple will complain i nv update again. haha....time for me to go out n buy some games to spend my boring n yet not sleepy sunday.